bckgrnd

Monday, October 13, 2014

I've waited 7 years for this news...

Seven years ago I made an appointment with a weight loss surgeon. I had high hopes of having surgery, losing weight, getting healthy and in turn becoming happy. Unfortunately, my insurance at the time would not cover the surgery. So for the next 7 years I yo-yoed up and down with my weight. Losing 35, gaining 40-losing another 24, gaining 30. Here we are today...I am now on blood pressure medication and have increased cholesterol and higher blood sugar. All which could have been avoided had I been able to have surgery. In some ways I am glad that It didn't happen. I mean it really was a blessing in disguise. Because at the time I was really wanting to have the Lap Band because it was "reversible". Which in my mind meant if anything went wrong it could be taken out and everything would go back to the way it was. 7 years later the surgeon I went to before doesn't even do the band any longer because of the complications they caused and how damaging it was to peoples internal organs.


I went back to that same surgeon to inquire about the sleeve gastrectomy on October 1st. Anticipating a long and drawn out process I was shocked to hear that not only was my insurance one of the best ones to have for bariatric surgery, but they also scheduled my surgery date right then and there. I am in shock and disbelief that things are happening so fast! It's finally my turn! I keep thinking "what's going to go wrong now, there must be something that comes up.


In one week I go in for my endoscopy and I meet with the nutritionist along with the mental health physician. I just can't believe this is all happening finally. I cannot wait to get this over with and start my new life with my new tool. I have been thinking constantly about the struggle it will be to no longer rely food for, well, everything! Its sort of like losing a friend. Food has always been there for me. It's never judged me. It makes me feel a sense of satisfaction. But all of those things have a drawback. With that comes an uncomfortable feeling, an unhealthy body, low self esteem and a dislike for clothes shopping. I'm ready for that to all change! I'm ready to say goodbye to what I once thought was my "friend" and hello to new adventures and building new, healthier relationships with an active lifestyle. I started making a list of all the things I want to do once I lose weight; riding a bike, fitting in roller coasters, climbing the rock wall, sitting with my legs crossed. Some of these things are the simplest things to the average size person but next to impossible for someone who is obese. I will add the list to the side bar and check them off as I complete each one.


This is my last week and a half eating all of the crap that has gotten me here....and so the food funeral begins.

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